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DT: come reap
Posted on 2004.06.04 at 18:02
How I feel about it all: Eh
Soundtrack: Why do I use Polgara for parenting posts?
You know what's insane? The fact that I, of all people, got in the mail today a catalogue called The Joyful Child: Essential Montessori for Birth to Three.

My question is WHY? Maybe it's because of the fact that Montessori Education is frequently and quite erroneously associated with Waldorf Education. They're so different it's like night and day, really. So hmm.

So, I'm looking through this catalogue, and find out that Montessori seems to be big on child-led weaning. Well, this sounds like a great idea, until you look at it closer. Here's the blurb for a booklet called How I Weaned Myself:

"Intelligent preparation for weaning begins very early in the first year of life because it is the child who knows when best to be weaned and we must be prepared to follow his lead. If we provide all the elements--chair, table, spoon, glass--he will make this important step of independence at the right (italics theirs) time. We asked a couple who followed this path to weaning to write this up to share with other parents and they recommended reading it early."

I dunno. This sounds waay too regimented for me, and I read on a Montessouri website that someone was using the traditional "weaning chair and table" (small table-and-chair set) when the child was eight months old. Bleh. Yeah, I know that Waldorf encourages weaning at a year, and I don't agree with that either, but. This sounds almost, I dunno, Mao-esque or something. This Is The Way Things Are and all.

*sigh* I know. The sound I hear is all those people mass-defriending me out of boredom (except patchfire, who will actually read this). I know if I asked "what are your five favourite songs", I'd get lots of comments. *g*

So...what ARE your five favourite songs, guys, and why?


peacey at 2004-04-06 19:16 (UTC) ()
Montessori, Shmontessouri. Whatever. Two good words to remember when raising a child: common sense. There is such a thing as thinking too much.

Ten (because I can't chose five) favorite songs (in random order)

The main theme to "Star Wars" because it never fails to send chills up my spine and instantly I am a child in awe again.

"Somebody to Love" by Queen because it highlights the absolutely amazing voice of Freddie Mercury. Without any doubt, he had the best voice *ever* in rock & roll.

"Where the Streets Have No Name" by U2 because they opened their Joshua Tree tour concert with it and I remember that, upon hearing the first few bars of it, my adrenaline that had been held back for weeks leading up to the show burst out of me like a rocket. Also because it brings about in me such a burst of optimism and possibility. Just their best song ever.

"Cold Shot" by Stevie Ray Vaughn. Just the sweetest blues song I've ever heard by the best blues guitarist in history. A riff that will stay in your head for days.

"Amazing Grace" as performed by LeAnn Rhimes (sp?. An acapella version that will bring tears to your eyes.

"El Paso" by Marty Robbins because it always inspires me to write. The best story-song ever sung with a voice that can be described as nothing less that haunted.

"Ring of Fire" by Johnny Cash because it transports me to childhood and I remember it being played on our old console stereo. Absolutely brilliant song by a brilliant man.

"Brand New Day" by Sting. Again, the optimism in this song inspires.

"I Swear" by John Michael Montgomery. My wedding song. :)

"One For My Baby and One For the Road" by Frank Sinatra. The live version. Just a bittersweet song delievered brilliantly by a man who sounds like he's lived it.

try to catch the deluge in a paper cup
primroseburrows at 2004-04-07 10:52 (UTC) ()
"Somebody to Love" by Queen because it highlights the absolutely amazing voice of Freddie Mercury. Without any doubt, he had the best voice *ever* in rock & roll. .

I think that you were the one who sent me the mp3 of George Michael singing this with Queen at a Freddie Tribute. Yeah, Freddie had a beautiful, lovely voice, but George's comes close. He was actually asked to front Queen after Freddie died, but declined. It probably was an honour to be asked, though.
peacey at 2004-04-07 14:22 (UTC) ()
George has a very good voice, true, but George is no Freddie. However, Freddie's voice was such a force of nature - so powerful, so dynamic and melodious - that he tops George hands down. His enunciation and phrasing of lyrics was perfection and his command of voice was comparable to that of the best opera singers. Listening to him sing is a gift.

Yeah, I heard George was offered the job of vocalist for Queen. Wisely, he realized Queen wouldn't be Queen without Freddie. The other three should've realized it too.
my life's so common it disappears
songdog at 2004-04-06 19:36 (UTC) ()
When Jon was a little baby, and I was a very new mom, I asked his (very cool, La Leche League recommended) pediatrician when I should wean him. His response: "I can't recommend to a nursing mom and baby when weaning is right for them. One of 'my mothers' nurses her babies until they are around five." I got the message he wanted me to get. I was already a committed nursing mom, so I wasn't going to wean to solid food, at 4 weeks, or anything like that. But I needed reassurance that what was right for *us* was ok. When Jon was 4 months old or so, my sister-in-law exclaimed: "Look at this baby! He is so big and healthy, and he's never ever had any *real* food!" I just smiled...she had been taught something about breastfed babies. So any regimented 'rules' about weaning need not apply. It's between the mom and her baby.

In no specific order:
Paul Simon - The Cool, Cool River
It just is. It makes me think.
Elton John - First Episode At Hienton
Again, just is. Makes me swoon.
Simon & Garfunkel (live 1981 version) - American Tune
I loved this solo by Paul, but when I first heard this version, I *died*.
Neil Young - Without Rings
The voice, especially. He recorded this after a long tour, and his voice was shot. But it was wonderful. I hear that he never has done it since, as the voice could never be the same. Though I'm sure I'd love to hear him try!
Led Zepplin - Stairway to Heaven
because, yeah.
You can't pick just 5. There are too many by:
Paul Simon
Indigo Girls
Cheryl Wheeler
Greg Brown
Led Zepplin
Dar Williams
Elton John

try to catch the deluge in a paper cup
primroseburrows at 2004-04-07 10:50 (UTC) ()
I can't pick just five, either. Stairway to Heaven comes darn close to the top, and so does Paul's "Further to Fly". And um. Yeah.
(Deleted comment)
try to catch the deluge in a paper cup
primroseburrows at 2004-04-07 10:54 (UTC) ()
Bleh. I don't know any of these. *writes down* I love learning new songs though. *g*
peacey at 2004-04-07 14:24 (UTC) ()
"Dragula" rocks the house. I *love* that song.
Really Sunny
willysunny at 2004-04-07 07:11 (UTC) ()
Dood, that is just wrong (in my humble opinion). Or, at least, I know Ethan would have been booted from Montessori. He nursed until he turned 3. And it was the most wonderful experience ever for both of us. What he taught me was that, in raising a child, there are no time frames, no restrictions, no forcing of anything as every child is an individual with individual needs.

As a preemie, I was told that he might not latch on at all, and oh-my-goodness did he latch on. He used to nurse, rub my neck and smile up at me tenderly. Talk about multi-tasking. He walked, talked, nursed and weaned when he was ready. I am a believer of setting boundaries for some aspects of child development, but I'm also a firm believer that sometimes you allow them the time they need to just curl up and connect with you for as long as possible. Because, before you know it, they're all grown up.

*wipes motherly tear*
try to catch the deluge in a paper cup
primroseburrows at 2004-04-07 10:49 (UTC) ()
d00d, I'm telling ya--take a long look at Waldorf. I don't agree with their opinions on weaning, but it's never forced, ever. mr_t00by's been in Waldorf sinc he was five, and he still likes to go (most) every day. Not bad for fourteen.
Really Sunny
willysunny at 2004-04-07 11:04 (UTC) ()
I most definitely will. I've been meaning to anyway. Thank you for encouraging me and letting me rant on your post. (In my opinion) Our society is so screwed up about nursing. Most other countries and continents don't give it a second thought, believing it to be a natural thing that occurs between a mother and child. If an individual mother chooses not to nurse, that's absolutely cool and understandable. I just happened to love it and do not believe in setting limits for other mothers who do as well.

My hubby is from The Netherlands and his family always encouraged me to nurse Ethan for as long as I wanted to and not in accordance to any other opinion. Once when his mother was over visiting, we went out to a restaurant, and someone started giving me the evil eye for nursing in public. She stood up, pointed a finger and said "What is your problem? He's got to eat! Just like you!" She then sat back down, crossed her arms and said "Nurse away, Ethan. Don't listen to any of them."

Hee. ;)
ringomc at 2004-04-07 09:09 (UTC) ()
Because of medical issues my kids were not breast fed so I am no expert on the subject. I will say this, however. Anyone who claims to have the "best" or "right" way to parent, especially during the newborn to toddler years, hasn't got the first clue. The very fact that they think their way is the end-all and be-all shows that they totally dismiss that every child is different and needs to be handled differently. Teach your children to respect others and don't let them walk all over you, that's the only advice I ever give.

Now onto more important things: Naming my 5 favorite songs of all time would be boring because they'd probably all be Beatles songs. :) Instead I'll give you my 5 current favorites...songs that have been on constant repeat lately.

Ain't That Enough - Teenage Fanclub, I should have been born across the pond because I like so many British bands. A friend made a copy of TFC's greatest hits for me about a month ago and I am officially hooked.

Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood - Santa Esmeralda, this is basically a ten minute Latin Disco remake of the 60's song done in the 70's. Brilliant. Ten freaking minutes and I love every second.

Are You Gonna Be My Girl - Jet, Catchiest rock song I've heard in a long time.

Yeah - Usher, I'm not a huge fan of R&B but whenever this song comes on the radio it stays on. Great R&B/Dance song.

One Man Guy - Rufus Wainwright, Great song, great backing vocals/harmony. I can't put my finger on it but he has such a unique style. I could listen to this song all day.

try to catch the deluge in a paper cup
primroseburrows at 2004-04-07 10:46 (UTC) ()
One Man Guy - Rufus Wainwright, Great song, great backing vocals/harmony. I can't put my finger on it but he has such a unique style. I could listen to this song all day.

Didya know that this wasn't written by Rufus, but by his father, Loudon Wainwright III (of "Dead Skunk" fame, sadly, because he has done so, so much more)? I think that Rufus' dad being the author makes it all the more cool. *g* And, yeah, Rufus has the style other styles wanna be. I adore him utterly.
ringomc at 2004-04-07 13:15 (UTC) ()
Cool! I did know that Rufus' sister is singing harmony on the song.
quiridion at 2004-04-07 11:11 (UTC) ()
I have no idea what I think about weaning, sorry.
Wow, 5 favourite songs? That is hard. *ponders* OK:
1) "Hallelujah" by Leonard Cohen (Rufus Wainwright version)
2) "Stairway to Heaven" by Led Zepplin
3) "House of the Rising Sun" by The Animals
4) "Golden Brown" by The Stranglers
5) "Sultans of Swing" by Dire Straits

This is in no particular order and I don't even know if they are really my top 5 (although I could not live without songs 1 and 2).

So what are your 5 faves?

P.S. I owe you a postcard from Barcelona. It is coming. (But so is Christmas). :S
try to catch the deluge in a paper cup
primroseburrows at 2004-04-09 07:23 (UTC) ()
Hmm. My five faves...well, I'll list five of my faves. There are plenty more.

"Stairway To Heaven" by Led Zeppelin
"Further to Fly" by Paul Simon
"We All Fall in Love Sometimes/Curtains" by Elton John
"Prince of Darkness" by the Indigo Girls
"If it Were Up to Me" by Cheryl Wheeler
"Go or Go Ahead" by Rufus Wainwright.

Those are just five. If I listed all of them, you'd still be reading next week, and I'd still be typing. There are thousands. Am music ubergeek.

Because my god, we forgot:

"The Decline" by NOFX
"Still" by Alanis Morissette
"I Do Not Want What I Haven't Got" by Sinead O'Connor
"Come Fly With Me" by Frank Sinatra
"You Feel the Same Way Too" by the Rankin Family
"Fear A Bhata" by Niamh Parsons
"The Prophet's Song" by Queen
"To the Teeth" by Ani DiFranco
"Fancy" by Reba McEntire

...you get the picture.
Pervy Hoodie Fancier
dancingrain at 2004-04-07 21:53 (UTC) ()


I was Montessori educated, but via the Association Montessori Internationale method (the AMI philosophy, the org founded by Dr. M herself). I don't think a single kid was weaned with that table setup, that I know of. I do remember we had kid-sized tables and chairs, but that was for our comfort, and had nothing to do with weaning.

I was always taught that AMI methods differed from AMS (the American society) but I haven't, as an adult, had enough chance to study it. In any case I don't think the extreme self-guidedness of a Montessori education is a good idea for every child, but it was definitively the best thing for me. Nobody every told any kid what was the "right" time for them to go through a phase. As an example I was the only kid in my kindergarten age class who didn't learn to read and it was fine, I was able to do it specially when the teachers realized, when I was a bit older, that i was showing signs of being ready, and it worked out wonderfully.

I dunno if you're actually interested in talking re Montessori at all but if you are, let's email or something cos any more detail of my experience and I'll start worrying my mom will somehow see this and recognize me. yay google paranoia.
try to catch the deluge in a paper cup
primroseburrows at 2004-04-09 07:08 (UTC) ()

Re: Montessori

I probably should learn more about the method before condemning it. I just have heard so much about the separation of play and work that I can't understand how Montessori and Waldorf are associated with each other. Waldorf's curriculum is pretty much fully integrated, with the arts present in all aspects. Of course, I'm a little(!) biased re: Waldorf, because mr_t00by has had such success with it.

Don't get me wrong, Waldorf has regimented aspects as well, and I don't always agree with them, but I have trouble with the association between the two methods. If you want to email me, I'm at primroseburrows@yahoo.com.

*hugs* You should come down south and have lunch sometime! I haven't seen you in a while. Maybe sometime before riddlefest_2004??

Oh, and have you heard about sage_salon? If you haven't joined, you should!

Pervy Hoodie Fancier
dancingrain at 2004-04-09 07:32 (UTC) ()

Re: Montessori

:D I shall email you. And I would *love* to come down and hang out for a bit sometime. I could take the commuter rail, I think, into Providence, pretty easily & cheaply.

I think maybe the two branches of Montessori must be much more different than I'd thought, because I can't remember any regimentation at all! My impression of my school was that the entire philosophy was that, with a little nudging to makje sure nothing gets left out, we pretty much did our own thing and to us, work *was* play.

I hear great things about Waldorf too and I would love to learn more about that system as well. So yeah, email :D. Gotta go back to being at work now but shall do this weekend!
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